This is my only conclusion I have now around my fertility ... that my body has forgotten how to make babies.
I mean its been almost ten years since I had a baby/conceived. So, somewhere along the line my body must have forgotten how to make a baby.
I am so tired of this TTC hell. I'm at breaking point. I need help urgently.
Here I was experiencing all these 'pseudo' symptoms, being late, the fatigue, the tender breast, the darkening areolas, the twinges ... you name it ... I had it. And still my test is a BFN!!!!!!!
Two tests later, two negative tests later I started spotting and now I'm just waiting for the witch to make a grand entrance.
I'm starting to get scared of the fact that I might never have a baby again and what scares me more is what it would do to my marriage. I don't know if we will be strong enough to make it through and this scares me so much that I often find myself crying myself to sleep.
Randy, or anyone for that matter, doesn't know how I am feeling as I don't openly talk about my 'problems'. I'm just tired of feeling so useless and insecure.
I don't know what my next step might be towards getting a baby ... I really don't know!
31 months of trying is enough!!!!!
4 comments:
Oh Kim, I wish I was there to give you a hug. It breaks my heart to see you suffer like this. No one needs to go through this, yet it happens. Nothing I can say will make it any better, but please know that I am here for you. If i were a genie I would grant your wish to have a baby right away!
thanks Mandy ... I hope you have broad shoulders - LOL
(((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))
Have you thought of maybe seeing a gynae or FS to help you?
Man Kim, I am so sorry you going through so much heartsore at the moment with TTC!
Sometimes it would be nice to just know what the future holds for you!
(((hugs)))
Post a Comment