AF oh AF!!!!!!!!

So the witch finally decided to make a grand entrance last night. Making my cycle 38 days long.

I am thinking of writing her a letter to notify her that she is not welcome anymore and that I wont be needing her services any longer - LOL.

In a way I'm happy to have AF, takes all the 'what ifs?' from my mind.

Will see what happens this month?!

Thanks ladies for always being here for me, I would probably be insane by now if it were not for you!!!!!!!!!


Mwah!!!

Kim
xoxoxo

I think my body has forgotten how to make babies ...

This is my only conclusion I have now around my fertility ... that my body has forgotten how to make babies.

I mean its been almost ten years since I had a baby/conceived. So, somewhere along the line my body must have forgotten how to make a baby.

I am so tired of this TTC hell. I'm at breaking point. I need help urgently.

Here I was experiencing all these 'pseudo' symptoms, being late, the fatigue, the tender breast, the darkening areolas, the twinges ... you name it ... I had it. And still my test is a BFN!!!!!!!

Two tests later, two negative tests later I started spotting and now I'm just waiting for the witch to make a grand entrance.

I'm starting to get scared of the fact that I might never have a baby again and what scares me more is what it would do to my marriage. I don't know if we will be strong enough to make it through and this scares me so much that I often find myself crying myself to sleep.

Randy, or anyone for that matter, doesn't know how I am feeling as I don't openly talk about my 'problems'. I'm just tired of feeling so useless and insecure.

I don't know what my next step might be towards getting a baby ... I really don't know!

31 months of trying is enough!!!!!

Starting over...

Well today is the day that I start from scratch with my diet. I decided I'm going to be very strict on myself and drink lots of water again.

I've been sucking at drinking water for the last 2 weeks. I was just drinking appletiser and I think it affected my kidneys or bladder. I drank citro-soda to 'flush out' my system and I'm feeling better already. I also decided to incorporate my eating plan and to make 'going to gym' part of my daily activities.

For the next four weeks I'm going to be very strict on myself as we are attending a wedding on the 31st and I just have to look good.

My eating plan for today is as follows:

B: 3 provitas with peanut butter and 1 cup of tea
S: LF yoghurt
L: roti with chicken fillet, lettuce, tomato and cheese
S: LF yoghurt
D: spaghetti and mince

Water: 1.5 litres

Exercise: 30 minutes (treadmill), 30 minutes (spinning)

With love
Kim
xoxoxo

OUR DIY HOME PROJECT (part 1)

Now you know what I get up to on weekends ... LOL

can you see the 2 different colours?

yes, its pink and grey ...

the grey wall with the peach painting

the pink wall ... thinking of getting silver frames with some picture on this wall


the grey wall ... we thinking of moving the TV unit to this side of the lounge

we will be taking out these cupboards to make the kitchen and lounge open plan ... but for now the yellow walls match the cupboards ...

cupboards will be put in against this wall

just wanted to show you how nice the yellow goes with white ... LOL

ok ... mom's bedroom ... we putting in a new curtain rail this weekend ...

Varney's bedroom and ceiling ... still thinking of a border????

Varney's bed ... I want to put up white wooden blocks spelling out his name on this wall ...

Ok, all that needs to be done is our bedroom and the bathroom and then I will start accesorising ...

PS: part 2 will follow soon ...

Kim