My life is a rollercoaster

Or at least it feels that way...

All these ups and downs and turn around. Feels like I'm on a rollercoaster going at 240km/h.

I have so many things on my mind.

1. Devandre: okay so most of you know he is not coping at school. I have discovered that his self-confidence is low. He reads to me perfectly as a grade 3 scholar should read, but seems that at school its a whole different story. He sometimes jumbles his words up, but then corrects it. But, honestly and sadly, when it comes to maths he is struggling. I feel so bad about this and sometimes I hate myself for shouting at him. I have made an appointment at and eye specialist, as well as, with our pead. Will update on what they have to say. Okay so that's school. At home, he is a happy child, although he does not have everything his heart desires we try our best to spoil him as to our definition of being spoilt.

2. Work: I cant say I'm unhappy, but then I cant say that I am with my job. It is starting to get too much of a routine and less of a challenge lately and it bores me although it keeps me busy for at least 2/3 of my day.

3. Family: so my family as usual has had a feud and my mother was once again caught in the middle. But, the one thing that pissed me off is that none of my brothers or sister spent Mother's Day with my mom. They didn't even bother to make it special or anything and my brother L did not even call to wish her. So I don't know how she feels in her heart or what's going on in her mind. I'm just happy that me and my family could spend the day with her.

4. My marriage: I don't know why I feel so stressed and anxious about my marriage lately. We not arguing more then we used to, in fact we had our last argument and make-up on Saturday, but somehow my mind is withdrawing from it all?????? Anyways, it might be because our spare time is being utilised by other interests like Randy and his exercising and me and my books. I hope we're not drifting apart. Or it might be this whole budget thing that is making me feel this way, or even the fact that we no longer share interest in making a baby.

5. My health: I think I'm sick or something. I've been having flu like headaches and sore hips since Saturday. I don't know what it might be or how to put my finger on it. I hope I feel better soon.

6. My car: and the state its in (that's all I have to say about it)

7. My friends: seems that now that we have given up trying all these friend preggy bellies are popping out. Once again I received an email from my other friend who actually wanted to take a bet that she would fall pregnant before me. Well she is about 5 weeks pregnant. That, now makes it 4 friends who are expecting. Though it hurts and I want to hide somewhere, I'm happy for her and I know that we (me & DH) made a mutual agreement to stop trying.

PS: sorry for being such a nag I will try to post something more cheerful in a few days time and hopefully some resolutions to all my problems.

Love ya
Kim